Learning, by definition is the acquisition of knowledge or skills through experience, practice, or study, or by being taught.

Learning by Definition

I’ve learned over my life that these lessons come by many means – whether it’s my children, my co-workers, life experiences, a passer-by, an old family friend, or something as simple as an epiphany or a fleeting thought while riding a bike the questions that I often am in search for an answer to are out there if you just take the time to listen.

In fact, although I would never admit this to her, almost all of the lessons that my mother, or for that matter any other family member tried to imbue, has somehow become something that I have now realized was sound advice.  I even find myself trying to pass the lessons on to others, or my own children.

When I was a child, I of course, thought I knew everything.  What I was going to be when I grew up, how many kids I’d have, how and when I’d meet my future husband – it all seemed so easy.  I thought that those kids who were in college were practically grown-ups and I would be so old by the time I reached that age.  I’d have it all figured out by then and would be on top of the world.  Little did I know I’d be even more clueless at 21 then I was at 10 planning my life course in the game of MASH.  You know the one…where you got to see which boy you’d marry, the car you’d drive, the house you’d have, etc. (Click the link to learn more and play a round for old times sake.)

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Well, my life, as it tends to do has long since passed college-age and those “formative” years.  A marriage, two children, and a career path later – I have come to learn that you never really know anything.  Despite all your planning, all the studying, all the preparation…until you are in a situation and you are just making decisions by your gut or by the wisdom of your seven-year-olds’ instinct, or by the voice of your mother in your head or sometimes by the seat of your pants, your life is just what you make it.

I think back on the times in my life when I tried to plan too much, when I thought my OCD tendencies and extreme organizational skill would help me sail right through a situation really just ended up backfiring.  In comparison to a time when I let spontaneity run wild and I had the time of my life and instead of failing miserably ended up succeeding beyond expectation.  You have to trust that not all things will go according to plan and find a happy medium between over-planning and being carefree.

What I truly believe is that life is a series of coincidences and that fate really does work hand in hand with our free will and what results is our destiny.  Unless you have one of those magic 8-balls and you’re trusting the limited number of responses that come out of that thing to guide your life choices.

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For example: If I decide to take the right turn instead of my usual left, visit a random gas station instead of the one I usually visit after work.  I just so happen to buy a lottery ticket because I found a dollar on the ground yesterday and that night I happen to win the Mega Millions jackpot – is it fate?  I was meant to take that right turn, that night; I was meant to find that dollar.  I have learned to believe that it is my destiny to win that money.

In my case my destiny changed almost ten years ago; while my older son was at Galloway, someone mentioned to me that there was an opening at a school where there friend worked.  I had recently left ‘Corporate America’ and was just subbing at Galloway because it was so much fun to be around the children (and to see my son around the halls).   I submitted my resume and was called in for an interview.  To my surprise I was offered not one, but two positions, I chose the one that best suited my life.  The job started several months later, when the next school year was beginning, in July.

The day I made the decision to take a job at the beautiful private school known as Trinity School was the day my fate changed.  Taking the risk of such a change after living the rat race of corporate in order to have more free time to spend with my children is one that didn’t take a second thought.

It isn’t anything like the career dream I’d laid out as that ten-year-old with a plan but I have learned to accept that as my destiny because it makes me happy and that is what I’ve learned is important.

Life is a series of ups and downs, wins and losses – challenges.  If life presents you with one, you will know if it is one worth taking or one to pass up.  Let your instincts be your guide, as cliché as that might sound.  They have long proven to be my best counsel.  Williams Jennings Bryan said, “Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.”

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